LUCKY CAFE: (Ahmedabad, India)

I perused the menu. "I'll have the Maska Bun please…with no butter". Maska is Gujurati for butter I have since learnt. So that's like asking for a jam donut with no jam. I could have asked for a plain bun, the equivalent of asking for a ring donut, but no, despite the waiter's earnest advice, I had to insist on the house speciality Maska bun…with no Maska! Us western big shots must look pretty darn stupid most of the time I reckon - but we're loaded, so we must be respectable and clever right?

The other delights that the 'Lucky cafe' served up included a 'Cadbury Pizza'??, a dead dormouse under our table (and N's foot), and it turned out the place was built on an ancient Muslim graveyard, so we were surrounded by around twenty tombs that could not be removed interspersed amongst the dining tables. That was odd.